While channeling the 5/5 Portal Twin Flame Reading, some important guidance for Twins on unconditional love and the differences between runner Divine Masculines and narcissists came through. I hate seeing supposed experts claiming that twin flames are just narcissists and bashing the journey. These people do not understand the journey at all! Plus, anyone claiming your twin will always behave perfectly, quite simply, doesn’t have a clue. But Spirit also pointed out that Divine Feminines must also be conscious of their own behavior. We are all just wounded by the human condition, and finding our way through this healing process. We must have compassion and empathy for our twins, and be leaders in higher based love frequencies.
Are Runner Divine Masculines Narcissists?
There are people in the Twin Flame Community who believe that your twin will never do anything to hurt you or behave in a negative or toxic way. They believe that twin flame relationships are always only good. I’m sorry, but this is FALSE!
That description is more like soulmates, not twin flames. Twins have a distinct karmic type phase of the journey. It doesn’t have to be true that every single twin flame pair goes through that, but most seem to! You go into separation for a reason, which causes pain by itself. Plus separations occur because of deep wounds, which cause defense mechanisms and negative behavior patterns. Some people claim DM’s acting like this are narcissists, but they’re not. Sometimes DM’s can be borderline toxic while they are in the runner phases, which can appear similar to narcissists, but there are very important differences.
Why is a wounded masculine hurtful?
Wounded masculines, as I stated above, are suffering from deep inner wounds from childhood and past lives that cause them to have significant defense mechanisms which come across as toxic behavior. These wounds can be inner child, self-worth, abandonment, mother issues, father issues, commitment fears, and more, that come about because their needs were not met. The intensity and depth of the connection & love with the Divine Feminine triggers those wounds and creates fear, so they self-sabotage. These DMs fear rejection and pain of abandonment by the person whose love is deeper and truer than anything they’ve ever felt. So their Ego kicks in, and they react negatively by pushing you away, acting self-centered, saying things they don’t mean, even pretending like they don’t feel the connection or things didn’t happen how you remember, or worse. This is all to protect their own hearts, because their Egos believe that they must protect their hearts before you hurt them later. It’s not a conscious thought process though. It just happens. They run, not because they are running from you. They are running from their own insecurities and fears to protect their hearts.
Many people go through a lot of therapy to heal wounds like this, but the twin flame journey heals all of this as well, without anyone making the conscious choice, which is what the separations do and why they are so important. Because you cannot walk away from this connection, so you end up surrendering to it and releasing those fears and that pain, in order to experience this love and accept it. Their bad behavior patterns are not an always, they are only until the journey heals them enough to let you in and accept unconditional love in this union. That is also why you achieve inner union (aka unconditional self-acceptance) before outer union. Because those wounds cause you to have low self-esteem, but that is what is healed during this process to unconditional self-acceptance, self-love and then unconditional love with your Twin.
What is the difference compared to a Narcissist?
Narcissists do have very deep and well hidden insecurity issues. That is why their Ego is so grandiose, to hide those self-worth and self-esteem issues. BUT narcissists have no remorse. Your Divine Masculine, when he behaves badly, he feels regret and guilt over the mistakes he makes with you and the way he may treat you. He doesn’t want to hurt you, and these emotions help him down the healing path. They put up walls around their hearts and act this way sometimes, when their wounds are triggered, until they are more healed and can open their hearts to you. But narcissists, however, do not care at all, and will hurt you over and over and over again as long as they are getting what they want.
Some people may disagree with me, but I have dealt with 4 narcissists in my life, and I have a Bachelor’s and Master’s in Psychology. I have the knowledge and the experience here, plus my twin flame journey, so please trust me. My own Divine Masculine went through a toxic runner phase. But he is healed and transformed, and we are stronger than ever now. His phase was a result of significant abandonment and parent wounds. But he always loved me and held me on a pedestal. That is exactly why he was triggered. He didn’t feel good enough for me, and he was afraid that I would break his heart at some point. I taught him how to receive unconditional love and know his self-worth. But this is a deep inner child healing process. It is not a conscious healing process for the DMs.
Narcissists, however, only care about control, possession, and power, and they will hurt anyone to get that. They are pathological liars who are only ever using you and manipulating you. They are sociopaths and psychopaths, capable of great harm because they have no conscience. A narcissists’ MO is sweeping you off your feet, appearing perfect, impressing everyone, and catching you, hook, line and sinker. It’s after a little while into the relationship that they show their true toxic colors, but by that point they have you feeling trapped in the relationship. From there, they just hurt you over and over again, with all the different types of abuse. To make it worse, they will never have compassion for you, and you will never get through to them that they are wrong in any way. There is nothing you can do except walk away or even escape! You can’t even have a conversation with them for closure.
One more important difference…with your twin flame, the connection is unbreakable and you cannot walk away or let go of the connection, ever. Even when you first go into separation and you really think the relationship is over, no matter how hard you try, you can’t give up or even stop thinking about them! With narcissists, eventually you realize you must escape their toxic chains that are holding you back, and once you do, trust me, you do not have a problem letting go and walking away. You may have to work through emotional healing from the abuse, but giving up that connection is not a problem.
*This reading includes the channeled messages on the topics of runner DMs versus narcissists, and compassionately interacting with your twin. You can read it here 5/5 Portal Twin Flame Reading: Get Ready for Divine Union! Part 1 or watch it above!
How do Divine Feminine’s trigger the Masculine’s wounds?
It’s very important for Divine Feminines to shift out of lower based, negative thought processes like withholding love and holding things against the DM, and shift into higher based vibrations of understanding, forgiveness & unconditional love. That doesn’t mean you have to just forget very bad behaviors. You can discuss those properly at the right time. But ultimately, your love for your DM and thinking about his perspective to understand where the behavior comes from, ends up overriding anything else. The pain of being away from them and trying to break the connection is greater than the pain they caused, so you find yourself able to release it and forgive them. So focus on handling it in a healthy way, forgiving and moving forward. The more you can shift into that mentality of unconditional love, the more you can understand and accept who they are from a soul level, encompassing those wounds and behaviors. And this deep level of understanding and acceptance helps the Divine Masculines heal those wounds and accept unconditional love into their lives. Accordingly, both of you are then raising your vibrations.
A lot of people who don’t understand the journey give advice to do things like give ultimatums, threaten that you’ll walk away, make them feel like they’ll lose you, or similar manipulative behaviors. But this is a bad idea. It’s an idea common in our 3D ego minds, and taught by society even. But the reality is that this is lower energy based manipulative behaviors that only poke the wounds that you want the DMs to heal and potentially also remind them of toxic karmic’s manipulative behavior. For example, if I make my DM afraid of losing me, then I’m poking his abandonment wound. So his reaction instead may be to withdraw more or even give up. Wounded divine masculines do not have healthy secure attachment styles, if you know psychology. They have either anxious ambivalent or avoidant attachment styles. So they will not necessary react how you want them to by doing something like that, and it may instead push them away further. Therefore, poking those wounds can only make things worse by reinforcing the fear and core of self-worth issues that is causing them to act that way in the first place. They can end up putting up more walls and it can create more delays! Making those threats is the same thing as telling them that they’re right, they’re not good enough and you will abandon them if they don’t do what you want. So it’s very important to show them unconditional love to help heal them instead of provoking these self-worth wounds.
But it’s not fair!
That’s true! Sometimes it doesn’t feel fair because you deserve to be treated right and to have a partner step up for you. But your DM is your sacred Divine partner, even your spiritual marriage. They are your person who you have that shockingly amazing connection & love with, that is unbreakable and eternal despite all the obstacles. And healing those wounds so that they will be able to treat you the way you deserve is part of this journey and this process. Plus, it also teaches you to be strong and capable on your own. So if you are behaving in any codependent type of way, like you need a partner and need them to act a certain way, that is your own shadow work to heal and change. DMs are going to get to that healed state where they treat you how you deserve, but before that, during the course of the journey & karmic situations, they just aren’t capable of doing exactly what you want.
It’s important for you to be compassionate, empathic & understanding, giving them the space and time that they need to get there. Learn to use healthy communication and boundaries. Explain your needs and your triggers. Use positive reinforcements and positive methods of communication to help explain your needs without making them feel like you will abandon them. That will help them break their negative behavior patterns because they’re going to feel safer with you, which helps them take down their walls and open their hearts. Shifting your behavior and reactions helps them shift theirs, and that helps both of you reach inner union so that you can then reunite in Divine Union externally.
Make sense?
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